50 year old; single writer; several books published and 1 on the way! Blonde hair (looks grey on the photos?) green eyes; 5ft 11; never drinks; non-smoker; unusual profile...

Mr Author's Profile
Well known handsome author seeks muse...
I am happy to send you my photos by email once we have chatted and I know you are genuine. I am a writer (modern novels) and travel widely doing my research. I am looking for a tall slim attractive companion, able to travel, who is interested in writing and in literature and who would like coming to publishing and media parties with me. All applications will be considered including from the U. S. You will be gorgeous and sexy and sophisticated and able to hold your own in all situations and with every kind of person. I am single and I am looking for a fun and inspirational relationship which will benefit both of us. You must have a U. K. Or U. S. Passport and be fluent in English and live in or near London (or Miami). This is a fab offer. If you cannot be bothered to persuade me, I cannot be bothered to reply. After an initial chat, I would expect to meet you in central London. Nobody worthwhile has either the time or the inclination for a cyber relationship.

My Email to Mr Author
Subject: A Picture Tells...
A thousand words and the right words paint the perfect picture.
Please check out my profile, I love creative writing and the arts and would relish the opportunity to meet you to discuss your "fab offer!"
Photos welcomed at *************
Mr Author's Email
I like your profile. Photos on their way.
My Response
Hey *********
Photos received and approved (!!!) So what next...to meet or not meet, that is the question and how is the competition looking, have you met many applicants or am I the best? Rhetorical question old chap...
Mr Author's Email
Obviously the next step is to meet for tea/coffee or an early evening drink...nothing too long/heavy in case we don't find chemistry together! The "competition" is strange! Those with the 'wow" factor in looks turn out to have zero conversation or intelligence or, most commonly, reliability (!) and those who are bright and fun just don't make the heart beat faster! To give you an example, I had a lunch date yesterday at 1pm and at 25 past one the date rang me to say that she had only just woken up and could be with me by 4pm! How could I rely upon such a person to turn up at the airport or at a public reception! And we had not met, only exchanged photos, so it cannot have been that she did not like me! I suspect you are finding the same with men...the handsome, fun and "wow" men are players and unreliable and the reliable and friendly ones are not cool! Anyway, let's meet. Send me a text and we can make a date next week?

The Date
Or should I say interview....assessment day....chemistry checker!!! Here goes...